Suman Nehra
Dear Mothers-in-Law of India (Most of You, Not All),
With due respect, may I please call you liars and hypocrites?
When your son gets married, you advise his wife to visit her family a little less often so that the ‘Bahu’ can grow affection in her new family…but when your daughter gets married, you so desperately want her to visit as often as possible so that she feels your constant support while adjusting to a new family.
When your son visits his wife’s family, you advise him to keep it short and quick, that it’s not very good to stay longer or gel too well with the wife’s family…but when you have your own son-in-law as a guest, you want him to stay longer and feel at home in every way possible.
When your daughter-in-law talks to her mother on the phone, you clearly express your disapproval of it as it’s not nice to tell what happens in this family to the family that she belongs to. Her mother may be poisoning her against her new family…but when your daughter calls to express her emotions about her new family, you take her to your room to talk uninterrupted for hours.
When your daughter-in-law doesn’t cook very well or make perfectly shaped rotis just because of the simple fact that she never did it earlier, you say, “What a mess you are! Your mother should’ve taught you basics”… but when your daughter faces the same issue, you very proudly say, “I never let my daughter do anything. I’ve raised her like a princess. She will learn it as the need may be. Such a quick learner she is!”
When your daughter-in-law does something in the best interest of her child, you know it’s not how it should be. You see her mother’s interference in everything she does… but when your daughter does the same thing on your suggestion, it’s a motherly concern and the daughter’s expertise in handling the child.
Your bahu should go to her brother’s home only after she has attended to your daughter. Isn’t it her festival too? Wasn’t your daughter supposed to do the same with her grandmother in that case, and then come to her brother?
Liars…because on the first day of her arrival, they say, “Ab se tum hamaari beti jaisi ho”. Then they circulate the same lie: “we treat her like our daughter.” In that case, let’s do a role-switch then! Try treating your daughter the way you treat your bahu for just a few days. There shouldn’t be a problem with that. It might just open your eyes.
Before ‘in-laws’, you were all mothers! Think for a while before you get trapped in your own lies and hypocrisy! Otherwise, you may end up coming across a bahu every now and then jingling around you-“Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire!”🙂
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